K-REV Christian Radio -
The Big K-REVelation


 

Characters:
K-REV Radio Announcer Michael
K-REV Radio Announcer Jacob

 

Summary:  
K-REV Christian Radio Announcers Michael and Jacob—stars of the famous Mike and Jake’s Morning Show—has a flat-out “revelation” moment.

 

 

(K-REV Announcers Mike and Jake are seated at an angled table, stage-left with 2  microphones facing them on the table.  Both Mike and Jake are wearing red “Beats” headphones over their ears.)

 

 

MIKE
You’re listening to the Mike & Jake’s Morning Show on the All-new Digital Family-friendly Christian Radio Network K-REV.  The top story in today’s news is the economy.  The government is reporting this morning that Retail Sales were flat last month again.  It’s another sign that the economy isn’t doing as well as they forecasted earlier this year.   

JAKE
Retail Sales were flat as a pancake? 

MIKE
Not pancakes, Jake— 

JAKE
Does that mean pancake syrup is still WAY to expensive?

MIKE
No, no no… the government is reporting that Retail Sales were flat last month again. 

JAKE
My momma always told me I was flatfooted.

MIKE
Don’t flatter yourself.

JAKE

I’m not!  My favorite bread is flatbread with tons of real butter.

MIKE
Yeah, if you eat too much of that stuff brother, you’ll flatline.

JAKE
You mean have a heart attack?  Yeah, like I’d let you take me to the Emergency Room but you have a flat tire on that old beater you drive.

MIKE
My car has a flat?

JAKE
Yessiree, Bob.

MIKE
I’m not Bob, I’m Mike.

JAKE
I’m Jake, nice to meet you.

MIKE
Very funny.  Why didn’t you tell me that my car has a flat?

JAKE
I didn’t want to ruin your day.

MIKE
Well those good intentions just fell flat!

JAKE
As flat as the roof on this K-REV building?

MIKE
(laughs out loud) Or as flat as Iowa.

JAKE
Hey don’t pick on Iowa.  My gramma’s from Iowa.

MIKE
I wasn’t picking on Iowa, silly.  I was just saying—

JAKE
Yes I know it’s flat like my feet.

MIKE
There you go, talking about your feet again.  Yuck!

JAKE
Well, for a flat fee, I won’t mention them again.

MIKE
(laughs out loud again) You’re on a roll today, brother!

JAKE
I’m on the honor roll?  I didn’t know K-REV had an honor roll!  That’s just flat-out funny.

MIKE
You’re killin’ me here, Jake.

JAKE
Nah—that 2 liter bottle of Pepsi you opened 2 weeks ago will do that!

MIKE
I forgot about that Pepsi from my birthday party.

JAKE
Yes sir.  It’s still in the K-REV employee fridge. It’s really flat now. 

MIKE
How do you know?  Did you have some?

JAKE
Yeah, I tried some yesterday.  Yuck.  It made my tummy hurt. Oh, that reminds me.  I was going to tell you this earlier: I saw something when I was doing my exercises earlier in the studio.

MIKE
What’s that?  You saw a flat truck drive by?

JAKE
No, no—I was doing sit-ups, and while laying flat on my back I saw something in the shadows on the ceiling.

MIKE
What’d you see?

JAKE
It kinda looked like the face of Jesus.

MIKE
Really?  (looks up, straining to see if there is anything on the ceiling) I don’t see anything?

JAKE
(looks up, too) It’s not there now.  The sun was just coming up.  The light was shining through the window in the Producer’s room straight into the studio.

MIKE
I can imagine that.  But that wouldn’t shine anything on the ceiling…probably just on that far wall.

JAKE
From what I could see, the sunbeams reflected off of the top of your flat screen monitor  to the ceiling. 

MIKE
That’s so awesome, Jake. What did His face look like?

JAKE
He had a beard, and you know what?

MIKE
It was a high def 3D image?

JAKE
You’re funny.  No, He was smiling.

MIKE
That’s the biggest K-REVelation I’ve ever heard.

JAKE
It really shocked me.  It made me really think about praying more.  Spending time with the ones you love is the only way to build relationships.

MIKE
Yes sir—it works that way with God, too.

JAKE
The more quality time we spend with Him—the less flat and empty our spiritual lives will be.

MIKE
The shadow knows.

JAKE
Very funny.  No, Mike—God knows what we need when we need it.  We just need to ask Him.

MIKE
I just thought of something funny.

JAKE
That happens sometimes.

MIKE
You learned this this while trying to get flat abs.

--bro. tim pickl   
Saturday January 5, 2013 A.D.

Originally posted on FaithWriters -- Check it out:
 
http://www.faithwriters.com/wc-article-level3-previous.php?id=44410

Return to Tim Pickl's Poetry Page